What is your heart whispering to you?
Sometimes our heart whispers to us and sometimes it shouts. Lately, mine was rather quiet and a bit heavy. It didn’t make sense to me why it would be heavy, as “life is good”. I am doing work that lights me up and brings me joy. My family is healthy and sassy. It’s summer in Wisconsin, which means no snow, so that is always a win in my book!
So what’s with the heavy heart?
I needed a change of scenery to get clarity.
My Thursday was empty – which on one hand freaked me out as a business owner, no appointments = no income. However, on the other hand… it felt like a gift, it was just the pause that I needed to get away from the noise around me so that I could listen within and reflect.
I researched parks along Lake Michigan, where I could hike and see the lake…which truly feels like the ocean. I picked Kohler-Andrae State Park as the destination as it looked pretty cool.
Expectations Creep In
Well, wouldn’t ya know it…the day before I had a lot of “shoulds” start creeping in on why I shouldn’t take the day off and go to the park.
It felt irresponsible as I hadn’t gotten all of my scheduled tasks done that I wanted to.
The adult and responsible thing would be to cancel my “me time” and work harder.
How many times have you scheduled something for yourself, but then cancel because you shouldn't? Like a girl's night out, or a trip to the coffee shop, or an afternoon off to read a book…but then cancel because you just “have too much to do and not enough time” or “no one else will do it, I have to” or “feel guilty for wanting to do something for yourself”?
I feel you.
Luckily, I had the perspective shift that it was time for a scenery change. I could bring my laptop and journal and if I felt inspired, I could write at the beach. Well – I am writing you from the beach right now on my laptop.
Here is what happened when I got to the beach:
I had to get my socks and shoes off as fast as I could to get my feet in the sand and walk along the water. Forget walking the path!
I dipped my toes in the SUPER cold water
I sat down to look at the waves, the water, and the birds
I felt anxious and thought...... I should start writing, I should make this trip count, I need to make this worthwhile. I need to be productive; I can’t just sit here and enjoy the waves. WTF….
I cried and cried
I allowed myself to sit in the emotions, watch the waves, and let myself unwind.
I didn’t realize how wound up and tense I was.
Holy buckets…. I do this work for a living and yet here it was sneaking right up on me again.
“Pressure to do more”
“Pressure to succeed”
“Pressure to be productive”
“Pressure to do it right”
“Pressure to follow the rules”
“Pressure to put everyone else first”
“Pressure to not waste time”
Can you relate?
I am guessing yes because every day I talk with amazingly heartfelt women who are working on rewiring these expectations that we put on ourselves or have let others put on us.
And here I was hook, line, and sinker buying into my limiting heavy expectations. Well, it’s good to know that I am 100% human too. We all are.
Here is what I learned at the beach:
I want to visit the beach regularly
I miss connecting with other people
I miss my girlfriends
I want to schedule a day at the beach with friends and family
I want to live by the water – like for real
It’s crucial to just breathe and connect inward without agenda or to-do’s
Seagulls are so much fun to watch
My clients inspire me daily with their vulnerability, courage, and commitment to go through the murky muck, to make their life better and brighter
Bring sandals when going to the beach
We live on such a beautiful planet!
Leave the 45-mile radius of my home more often to adventure and see new scenery
I will hold a women’s retreat on the shore of Lake Michigan soon… it came through to me as I was soaking in the inspiration
If you have stayed with me until now, let’s bring it home with the moral of the story. 😉
Listen to your heart, take time for yourself, and let your wisdom speak to you. It’s there within you and it wants you to listen.
When you listen from that place, there is clarity, there is knowing, and there is a connection. I will be acting on the clarity that came through for me!
You don’t need to take a 4-hour roundtrip drive to the beach as I did, but you could.
What you could do, what we all could do.. is just create mini check-ins with ourselves throughout the day.
What am I thinking?
What am I feeling?
What do I need right now?
Sometimes you will be able to act on what it is that you need at that moment.
Stepping away from the desk to take a 5-minute break
Ending the conversation that is going in circles
Actually, go to the bathroom because your bladder is about to burst
Eat some food
Asking for a hug.
Sometimes you will have to write it down or make a mental note of it and take care of it later.
Schedule personal care appointments
Schedule a date with your partner
Schedule a meet-up with your friends
Schedule time at the gym
Schedule a day off
Go shopping for healthy food.
When you take time for the mini check-ins you will be more in tune with what you need. When you know, you can act.
Take time to listen to the whispers in your heart. It’s way better than waiting until they shout or go silent….. That my friends is a topic for another day.